Been Thinking.
So, I’m a nerd, right, we all get that, moving on. I’m a nerd that’s kind of obsessed with reading history, all kinds, ancient civilizations, anthropomorphic changes of the 20th century, cultural origins, et cetera. Top of my list though, and that’s a big thing to quantify, is studying the Second World War. Yeah, I was thaaat kid in your high school history class. Hand always up, open-ended questions being asked, that both teachers and students hate, for the first because you actually have to compose an answer that meanders away from memorised source material, and for the second because you have to actually listen and analyze the words being said, the knowledge whizzing past your head, and not follow along in your Education for Dummies textbook. No, I wasn’t the top student, so not quite the personification of spite and derision I could have been, but I wrote a mean essay. History class was really special to me, and the study of past events continues to be a great joy in my life. What I caught myself doing was actually thinking about these dates and facts and figures, and all the little absurdities that mankind is built upon, on a personal level, and I mean actually considering the personal ramifications that famous figure had after making that crucial decision, thinking about all the little nuances leading up to it, really taking and turning and mulling stuff over. Then something great happened. This is truly brilliant, and it makes me so sad when other young people don’t catch this. I realized the value, and power, of perspective. Better then that, I could feel mine widening. Now, people who know will probably read this, scoff, chalk it up to more anonymity-driven internet hubris, and say, no way, he’s so close-minded, over-opiniated, and bigoted, freaking little 18-year-old Rush Limbaugh. I understand why you’d think that, I even agree with that. Here’s the thing. My opinions, my bigotries, my broad strokes of generalisation, they are all informed by my knowledge of history, my perspective on the world. I’ll clarify that. I am not confirmed in my little bubble of right-mindedness by reading about the world at large, and the world gone by, it doesn’t tell me I’m right, it tells me something more important. It gives me an incredibly large menu, instead, from which to choose my opinions, my stances, my frames of reference. I’ll try to paint this out as a decent mental image. Your standing in front of a buffet table, and in stretches far to either side of you. The dishes in front of you are small slivers of emotion, reason, fact, fabrication, experience, and feeling. They are the components of human existence. Behind them, there is laid out every single example of their use. For the sliver that is basic arrogance, there is arrayed great disasters, wars, upheaval, but also great works, things that are truly impossible for a man who believes himself to be ‘just’ a man. Hope I can home in on the point I’m trying to make here, because it’s bugging me how close to poignant I’m feeling. Final stretch. As you fill up your plate with these slivers, they combine and congeal and permutate, creating a myasma of possibilities, but still, ahead of you, is every single example of what has occured when those specific ingredients are present, and combined. Now, this sounds like hocus pocus, but because you’ve been down the length of that table countless times, you’ve studied each kernel of life and you know their effects, you know exactly that when you’ve got this plate loaded with these things, those are the likely results, because you can see all the results from every other person throughout history with the same load. Whew, long sentence. The kicker is, with this universal perception, the ability to see, and understand, the entire table, you also know that if you change, remove, or add, a single one of those slivers your make-up can change dramatically. The kaleidoscope shifts. To fully understand the composition of the human structure, I think that’s definitely one of the key parts of divinity, of being transcendant, more than human. If I was someone who firmly believed in a utopian afterlife, I’d be looking forward greatly to that state. Of course, full comprehension in a lifetime is impossible. Congratulations to me, this rant is slowly started to weave back into what I started saying what seems like a year ago. That’s the importance, and wonder, of understanding our history. We only know the tiny parts of the table that we’ve seen, thought about, analyzed. Because to just have some of those traits in ourselves is definitely not enough. Yes, I may be an arrogant ass (as many of you think :P) but that’s not enough to stand before the table with that sliver that we own right before us, and even have an inkling of the countless ways its played out before, in people with that same attribute. It’s people who are ignorant of themselves, and are devoid of the capacity for critical thinking, that sadly miss out on this amazing smorgasbord that is collective human experience, and our capacity to learn from other’s mistakes. To actually say what I wanted to. I’m standing at this table, I have attributes X,Y, and Z, and have learnt enough from personal experience, listening to others, and external sources, like history books, to see a set distance into the past behind it. Let’s say I like what I see. People with attributes like mine, lets say compassion, patience, innocence, and grace, so basically the opposite of me, seem to turn out fairly well, and very few go off the deep end, and don’t lead an enjoyable life. My friend over here, on the other hand, has all the same traits as me, but he’s also very competitive, hungry to learn, has a real drive. He sees fantastic things behind his plate, people like him throughout human existence have been great humanitarians, reformers, people who caused change. This makes him happy. However, he looks over at me, sees in me almost all of the same parts as himself, and despairs because he cannot imagine seeing greatness in my life. He is informed by his understanding however, and sees that I simply don’t have the components neccessary to achieve the same he way he is equipped too. Or possibly he doesn’t see, doesn’t think critically, and just gets fed up with me being a jackass and never doing anything big, because I’m just not motivated like he is. Saddest of all options though, is that he never thinks about this, at all, never gives himself the ability to change because he’s unaware of the options. That’s the best part, and if this wasn’t true everything I’ve said is moot and dead. Human beings can change. Subtlety, dramatically, gradually, or rapidly. We are the most versatile of creatures. Why study the actions of the past if we cannot change the decisions that shape the future? No point, but we absolutely can. That is simply why we must. Hugely convolutedly, which isn’t a word, shaddup, I’m back to the beginning. I love WW2 history. So much humanity was experienced in those few years. The scope of human experience, facility for change, outcomes dictated by what people had put in their life, technological marvels and crazy gaffs. I love it, love it love it. So, I want to do a podcast about it. Have no idea what it would be like. What I’d say. If anyone would listen. And that’s a downer thought. I’ve enjoyed podcasts so much over the past couple years, and learnt alot, tech news, investing, cooking, history, human experience. It is a totally kickass medium. So I want to dip my toe in there and give it a bit of a swill. Any thoughts/suggestions would be rad. I’d probably indeliably wind up at some weird existential point like I did in this post, and if you think that’s rubbish or if it’s worthwhile lemme know. Thanks for reading guys. If you got to this point, seriously, thank you.
